appropriately. When we lack self-assertiveness, we are either overly dominant or
overly passive.
1. Inappropriate Dominance. This means you habitually get your way at the
expense of the other person. This leads to a build up of resentment in the other
person towards you.
2. Inappropriate Passivity. This means you habitually allow the other
person to get his way. This leads to a build up of resentment in you
towards the other person.
Profile of Inappropriate Dominance
Here are typical everyday examples of being inappropriately dominant:
You ask others to do leisure activities you want to do, yet rarely do things they want
to do.
When there is a choice of movies, restaurants, or games, your preferences usually
prevail.
You spend time on hobbies (e.g., playing hockey, shopping), and are unconcerned
that your partner must do more household work to accommodate you.
You expect other people to come to your house, drive to see you, and put themselves
out of their way to socialize with you…yet you rarely do this for them.
You are self-absorbed in conversations; if you are not talking, or the conversation
does not revolve around you, you tend to check out.
You get your way in household issues, such as: how the house is decorated, whether
you have pets, where you live, and the cleanliness level of the house.
You expect your partner to spend time with your family, but do not often return the
favour.
When there are differences over issues such as spending money and raising children,
you get your way over your partner most of the time.