Sometimes, we lean on people by over-pursing them. Here are a few examples.
You call too often (and don’t realize it).
You wait around for him or her instead of making your own plans.
You call and tell him/her you’re lonely or depressed.
You agree to spend time with the person when it’s inconvenient for you.
You are having a bad time with the person, but instead of politely ending your
time with him or her, you stay in the situation.
You assure the person your cell phone is on, just in case he/she wants to call you.
You ask for affection and give it even when the person isn’t being affectionate.
You may even try harder: “Do you want a back rub?”
You stop focusing on your life and become focused on the other person’s life
instead.
You ask for re-assurance about your personality, looks, etc.
You give the person over-the-top affection. “You’re the most magnificent woman
I've ever seen, and I can’t believe how lucky I am.”
2. Over-Talking
The second way we lean on people psychologically is by over-talking. Most of us talk too
much and cannot control our need to talk.5 We also talk too much about ourselves. This
says, ‘Please give me your attention and approval.’ We all want to be someone; we all
want to feel special. These feelings are natural, but they are also the prime motivation
for over-talking.
You call too often (and don’t realize it).
You wait around for him or her instead of making your own plans.
You call and tell him/her you’re lonely or depressed.
You agree to spend time with the person when it’s inconvenient for you.
You are having a bad time with the person, but instead of politely ending your
time with him or her, you stay in the situation.
You assure the person your cell phone is on, just in case he/she wants to call you.
You ask for affection and give it even when the person isn’t being affectionate.
You may even try harder: “Do you want a back rub?”
You stop focusing on your life and become focused on the other person’s life
instead.
You ask for re-assurance about your personality, looks, etc.
You give the person over-the-top affection. “You’re the most magnificent woman
I've ever seen, and I can’t believe how lucky I am.”
2. Over-Talking
The second way we lean on people psychologically is by over-talking. Most of us talk too
much and cannot control our need to talk.5 We also talk too much about ourselves. This
says, ‘Please give me your attention and approval.’ We all want to be someone; we all
want to feel special. These feelings are natural, but they are also the prime motivation
for over-talking.